14 October 2010
Of course this is good news, because it means that if I pass the test of Monday's ultrasound, I will get to continue with this IVF cycle without delays. On the other hand there is a little twang I feel every time I get test results back and everything is "normal". For years nearly every test has come back with normal results, or minor things that should not be an issue for conception. The doctors always think this is wonderful news, and I'm supposed to be pleased about it too, but I can't help but think something is not normal or I would have been pregnant long ago.
This is the curse of unexplained infertility. You are always searching for something to blame, and when there is no known medical reason, you blame the next thing in line -yourself.
Sometimes I wish the Dr.'s would just make something up instead. It would be easier to accept something like: "Your fallopian tubes are connected to your stomach, so you keep digesting your embryos" or "Your husbands sperm took a holiday in Mexico and just can't seem to earn their SCUBA tickets". It would be easier to justify why we are doing IVF.
Fingers crossed tight that there are no more speed bumps in this cycle, and we eventually end up with an unexplained baby. "Honestly Aunt Martha, we didn't have intercourse, this baby just magically appeared in my womb".
I couldn't have said it better :wall:
ReplyDeleteSometimes I just want to hear "this is what's wrong with you and this is how we fix it"
But an unexplained baby would be awesome too, poor Aunt Martha won't know what to think! :wall:
Tracy1234, 14 October 2010 - 07:53 PM
Fingers crossed for you!!
I'm sorry, but I had to laugh at the digesting of the embryo comment..too funny!
Loopy, 14 October 2010 - 07:53 PM
Me too.:wall:
Victoria, 14 October 2010 - 08:48 PM
So true! To add to the Aunt Martha bit...
When you go over due and everyone tells you that the baby's only going to come out the same way it got in... You mean I'm going to have to pay a doctor to insert something inside me and force it out???!!! :wall:
TashaS, 14 October 2010 - 08:57 PM
(LOL Tasha!!!)
Silver - OMG you hit the hammer on the head with your comment "On the other hand there is a little twang I feel every time I get test results back and everything is normal...The doctors always think this is wonderful news, and I'm supposed to be pleased about it too, but I can't help but think something is not normal " I have always felt that way too but never have seen it put into words. Thanks because I largely feel so pessimistic about IF now. As always, I just love your posts.
LisainSK, 15 October 2010 - 05:45 AM
I can totally relate. I used to drive myself mental thinking everything was wrong with me. Started trying at 33 then after 5 years that included alternative treatments and 4 IUIs, 5 FETs and 4 fresh IVFs following the Alan Beer's Center treatment recommendations (IVIg until 30 weeks and blood thinner until 26 weeks) finally resulted in a baby. Some RE's would just say it was a fluke since they don't believe in immune issues but this is the cycle that finally did it for me. Unexplained is such a frustrating diagnoses and I was always told that unexplained people still had good results with IVF. You are so right about wanting to hear a reason. I was always dissapointed everytime they told me nothing was wrong with me! Love the part about the fallopian tubes being connected to the stomach! :wall:
Lisa1995, 15 October 2010 - 07:14 AM
Here, here for me too, Silverdollar. It's like we unexplained folks should be all the more optimistic than others with diagnoses. Sorry, but the BFNs hurt just as much and the not knowing makes us nuttier than fruitcakes!!!!! Another one of life's mysteries... that has become my mantra. Hang tough, Silver. You are definitely moving closer and closer to achieving your dream of a family. In the meantime, you are making us smile with your funny blogs :wall:
rhubarb, 15 October 2010 - 09:31 AM
You crack me up SD. You've illustrated the frustrations of unexplained infertility so well! THat bucket is so frustrating. Too many question marks, too little time and money to answer them all. Boo.
I love the 'unexplained baby'. I laughed out loud!!
Baxie, 15 October 2010 - 10:55 AM